Dragon's Tail

“Look up in the sky.
See the pretty mushroom cloud.
Soon we will be dead.
Haiku written by fifth grader Richard Rhodes

Got a book from “Choice” to review about atomic narratives called “The Dragon’s Tail.” One genre was Fifties monster movies, featuring ants (“Them), dinosaurs (“The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms”), an octopus (“It Came from Beneath the Sea”), and other mutants (including, most famously, Godzilla) created due to nuclear fallout. Such a fate also befell “The Incredible Shrinking Man.” The monster in that case was the mushroom cloud that transformed him. The author’s name is Robert Jacobs, same as a boyhood friend who was a jock in high school and still is in touch with Terry Jenkins. At a late-Sixties party Terry and Gayle threw, I told “Jake” that my Nehru jacket n only cost twenty dollars. “It looks like it,” he replied snidely. You would have never have guessed that he and Donald, our nerdy scout leader, were brothers.

Schererville town historian Art Schweitzer passed away. Post-Tribune reporter Michelle Quinn called him a one-man historical society and quotes Heidi Zima as saying, “There’s no one who loved this community more than he did.” The longtime volunteer fireman worked for Acme Steel for 30 years. Known for wearing khaki shirts with several pens in his pockets, he was a voracious collector and evidently would show up to record on camera for posterity events that he believed historically important. Wish I had known him. I told Steve McShane that the Archives should look into getting his stuff and maybe even have an exhibit of it or set up a “Schweitzer corner” where it could be on display or made use of in the service of Clio, our common muse.

Paul Kern says he finished reading Edward Gibbon’s “Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire” and is starting John Lothrop Motley’s “Rise of the Dutch Republic.” Pretty heavy stuff. I replied that I’m into novels and recommended Richard Russo’s “Straight Man.” He mentioned being in close Facebook contact with former student Terrance Durousseau, whose journal I published in my “Ides of March 2003 Shavings issue. In a section of “Gary’s First Hundred Years” that raised eyebrows but one I consider among my most creative, I made use of it in this paragraph: “Working at Church’s Fried Chicken, Terrance Durousseau joked about politicians threatening to change the name of French fries to Freedom fries because our erstwhile allies weren’t gung ho for war. One customer reeking of alcohol wanted a refund, claiming his order got messed up, then pretended he’d been short-changed. On March 15 Durousseau wrote: ‘The manager checked the bleed box, where 20 dollar-bills are dropped. It was empty, but the man still left in an outrage.’ The day’s highlight was a call from older brother Cool Breeze, thanking him for the ten dollars and card featuring a bikini-clad woman promising, ‘Tammie is going to remove her top for you.’ Inside was a chimp named Tammie.”

Received a handwritten letter from 1979-era student Terry Helton, an African American who says he feels more comfortable living in Ellis, Montana, than he ever did in Gary, Indiana. He had a number of job complaints, however, and apologized for an earlier anti-Obama rant. The Prez, incidentally, was great at the White House Correspondents Dinner, taking a swipe at Jay Leno (“the only person whose ratings fell more than mine”) and Conan O’Brien (he was glad to precede Leno “because we have all seen what happens when someone takes the time slot after Leno.” He chided birthers who claim he’s not an American citizen. Referring to the couple who crashed a state dinner last year, he quipped, “Odds are that the Salihis are here.” As if Obama doesn’t have enough on his plate, a gigantic BP oil spill threatens the entire gulf coast.

Saturday was a Philadelphia sports day on national TV, first an exciting overtime hockey game between the Flyers and the hated Boston Bruins, then FOX carried the Mets versus the Phillies, led by ace Roy Holladay (a blowout with “Doc” hurling a complete game shutout). That evening we played bridge at Hagelbergs, and I emerged the winner on the strength of a slam that partner Toni played. Sunday I got in six board games, winning only Amun Re by a single point. Had the final sacrifice been different by as little as a dollar, I’d have lost. There was a way either Tom or Dave could have won. Both St. Petersburg games also went down to the wire, fodder for a lengthy telephone rehash with T. Wade afterwards. Cubbies own a three-game win streak on the strength of Afonso Soriano’s four HRs in that span. When he goes on a hot streak, there’s nobody better. Home alone (Toni went to hear Dick Hagelberg sing at Vaplo University’s chapel – they did Mahler’s “Resurrection” in German), I talked with a couple old friends, including Chuck Logan, who recently visited his 97 year-old grandmother in New York (“she recognized me, I think,” he reported) and had just finished watching a 20 year-old Irishman win a tournament over Phil Mickelson.

Got a rightwing group email about the so-called Stella awards, named for the woman who sued MacDonald’s after she put hot coffee between her legs while driving and got scalded. One supposedly claimed a would-be burglar got trapped in a garage and successfully sued the owner he was trying to burglarize. Then there was Kara Walton, of Claremont, Delaware, who supposedly sued a night club owner because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth attempting to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge.” The only trouble, according to a USA Today article, is that these things never happened. They are just propaganda.

On Facebook Anne Balay posted a picture of her dressed as a man complete with slicked down hair, dark eyebrows, and fake mustache. She asked her class to cross-dress for a day, and about a third of them did. Two black guys looked very voluptuous as women. Anne said Chuck Gallmeier sat down next to her in the cafeteria and didn’t recognize her at first. Interesting experiment. Joy Anderson sent a reminder that next Monday’s book to be discussed by History Book Club members is Lester Langley’s “The Americas in the Age of Revolution, 1750-1850.” It compares America’s war for independence to the 1791 Haitian slave revolt and the struggle in Latin America against Spain. I may go. At the last meeting the group discussed a book about harems. Joy quipped, “I almost reeled in a new member when I told him about the ‘Behind the Veil’ book and that we came dressed for the occasion! His face was so full of anticipation that I had to say that I was joking.”

Upper Dublin classmate Connie Heard Damon, working with Janet Stuart Garman on our fiftieth reunion, emailed wondering whether I had Pam Tucker Rudolph’s email address. Turned out that Pam and I spent the morning a few days ago emailing back and forth about two dozen times. The closest I came to flirting was to say I sure could use a back rub. “That’s Toni’s job,” was her succinct reply.